thirty ten zero nine

“everything will be alright
if you just stay the night”
(rachael yamagata)

12:47 am.

it was a no run day.  again.  it was raining.  oh great.  it was windy with winds at 20 mph but kinda humid though.  forecast tomorrow is even a higher chance of rain.  oh dude.  but sunday is gonna be sunny.  well.  it’s the season of fall.  obviously.

i am always amazed at the behavior of butterflies.  i wrote about my thoughts on their metamorphosis and the relation of their life stages to living.  it’s an evolution as well.  i realized that there is more to life than just being a caterpillar or a pupa.  after we fully develop into full-grown butterflies, there is more to life than just be stuck in a single leaf or a single plant.  as we begin to spread our own wings and learn to fly, we start to discover that there is a bigger and a more beautiful world out there waiting for us.

of all the butterfly species, i am more into the monarch butterflies.  well.  aside from their sweet color patterns, their behavior on migration is amazing as well.  in the fall, they travel southward.  but in the springtime, they travel due north.  they are the only butterflies of their species capable of doing a transatlantic flight.  their behavior on migration is just like that of the migratory birds.  it’s a very dangerous journey for them and many lose their lives along the way.  and no single monarch butterfly ever made it through the transatlantic round trip flight.  and this wonder of nature is still a subject of research until today.

their migration is an essential part of their life and reproductive cycle.  probably they are traveling south about 2,000 miles for their home in the winter.  and only to travel north bound again for their home in the springtime.

and the same is true with the migratory behavior of the nomadic types of whales.  they travel thousands of miles as well to be home.  safe on their home grounds for mating, calving and feeding.

i think it’s the same case about the thing i call going home as well.  after the long, cold and darkest winter, you go back north which is homeward bound.  you follow the bearings northward as you travel for home.  home in time for spring.  the spring of a new life and a new beginning.

this story of nature tells us something.  that even in the wild, the essence of a home never changes.  home is still where your heart will be.  home is still where your heart longs to be.  home is still where your heart is.  for a home spells safety in spite all the dangers that lurk around us.  it is and will always be our comfort zone.  it is our warmth amidst the biting cold.  it’s where all our love is beneath all the hate.  it is our inner peace in all the chaos.  it is everything we ever hope for in this life.

can i ever make it home?  now i’m beginning to wonder if i really deserve to have a home to begin with.  well?

i’m out.

12:59 am.

“when i’m all alone it’s
the best way to be.
when i’m by myself
nobody else can say goodbye”
(edi brickell and the new bohemians)

~ by the fortunate pilgrim on October 31, 2009.