fourteen zero five zero nine
9:23 pm.
“i know sometimes
it’s gonna rain…
cause i can’t
sleep through the pain” (ne-yo)
oh dude. it felt good to be back once again. to my old crib, dude. the so-familiar smell and the familiar faces. the cool sounds and the gorgeous sights. oh dude. where else? starbucks, dude. its the place. wow. it feels sooo good.
remember the time when i got offline for almost three months? i mean when our router at home fucked up. oh dude. i was always at this place just to be online. yeah. and that was like almost three months ago. yes. during the coldest winter. i would be like always here almost everyday just to do this thing i was so committed to. yes. this blog and everything about it. braving the deepest snow, enduring the strong winds and the chill factor, the unforgiving rain, the blistering cold, hail and sometimes walking in a snowstorm and in the negatives. oh dude. and walking home along the dark alleys in the darkest of night. oh yes. and thats what i would always call the passion for the thing. could you even believe that? yes, i did those things just for this. i was so crazy about this and i am still now. and will ever be, i guess.
well. im here now coz i have to download something from my email. a very important document which i need to send by tomorrow. and the wireless connection at home is kinda messing up again. and of course, for this blog again. my daily memoir which i promised to fulfill. well. in here all things stand forever, right? thats what it is, dude.
well another reason why im probably here is hooking up with someone. yes. and i think thats cool. LOL
the sportsbar next door is packed. the red wings are playing with the ducks and its on game 7 now. and they’re like so loud cheering and all. LOL go ducks! ooops. go red wings! LOL
in my journey, one thing i got to realize is people are strange. really. and i am too. maybe its the uniqueness in us, dude. no one is ever the same, right? but what sucks is some people are the same. or try to be the same. coz they dont wanna be typecasted i guess, so they tend to follow a trend. they wanna be with the popular. with the majority. in short, maybe they just wanna play safe. and that makes them fake in a way. and fakies sucks.
they cant be just themselves coz probably they dont wanna let people judge or misjudge them. and that sucks. you know, its always okay to be just yourself. its just okay to stand by what you believe in all the time even if its not the majority’s stand. you know what im sayin? dare to be different coz we are all different to begin with. but you just got to have the balls to do it and to stand for all your convictions. coz if not, you’ll just end up being ridiculed and you’ll just look so lame. and thats not being funny at all. coz that sucks. i say it again. that sucks, dude.
and you know what sucks even more? dig this. when people dont understand you, your actuations or your trip, they just call you weird. hahahaha thats the easiest thing to do, i guess. instant judgement, dude. you know why? coz they just dont wanna understand why. or they simply refuse to understand why you’re that way. coz you know, in order to understand a person, you really have to know that person inside out. and till you understand a person, only then will the things that person does start to make sense. you know what im sayin? and thats kinda hard, right? and people dont have the time and interest to know a person deeper. so the easiest way is to call that person weird, right? hahaha i think that makes sense.
one perfect example maybe is me. why do i waste my time every night writing this shit? why do i take all the time to write all my daily thoughts as vividly as i can recall them at the end of the day? and to think i was doing it for more than six months now. and still counting. hahahaha crazy, isnt it? but you will never understand why. even if you want to. till you know why. till you know who i really am. till you know the whole story since day one. and only then everything here will start to make sense. and you know how i write in reference? only then will you guys understand what i really mean. coz in here, things are not what it seemed to be sometimes.
now you can start calling me crazy. or weird. LMAO
i was talking about love the past days. another thing that just sucks about the thing love is people always claim that they’re in love. others claim to be super in love or being crazy in love. wha??? but you know what? from a different angle you can see them being in love coz of convenience, i guess. or coz of the material side. and that sucks even more, i guess. others are in love coz of the thrill or the adventure. others for the trophy. others for the experience. oh dude. thats not even love to begin with. are you really in love? do you know what it takes to be really in love in the strict sense? oh dude.
well. who am i to judge, dude. but from a different standpoint, you can really tell. its no rocket science, dude. you can clearly see. hahahaha there’s not even a tinge of happiness in their eyes, dude. lip service. show off. but again. who am i to judge? they might have their own reasons other than what i said like his mom likes that girl better than the other. hahahaha now its my turn to say, thats weird. coz i dont wanna understand why. hahahaha coz i can see it. there’s nothing to hide anyway. LOL
10:11 pm. now let me do my stuff now. one of the reasons why im here hanging out at starbucks.
well. another fucking day. another fucking day lived. another fucking day survived.
time to go. im out.
“Wonder if you ever see me
And I wonder if you know I’m there
If you looked in my eyes
Would you see what’s inside
Would you even care?” (selena)
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